I've just finished reading the sixth book of 'Skulduggery Pleasant', 'Death Bringer' by Derek Landy and it's just reminded me of how much of a fangirl I was of the book (and of him... Slightly). Derek Landy is quite an amazing author, and I've thought so ever since I had to read his first book about three years ago. When I say that I had to read his book, I most certainly had no choice but to. I was chosen to be a part of a voting group that had to choose between nine books that were entered for a competition. Of course, Derek won the competition.
There's one thing that made this special though. I'll say it in the way that I told Devin. Basically I was a sneaky know-it-all that got in contact with this now famous author and we spoke quite a lot. He was obviously interested in me (Not in that way -o-) and when he won the book competition (and came out with an amazing speech at the awards ceremony and it was like a stand-up gig. Hilarious stuff. But so are his books; apart from being awesome, amazing, and somehow touching) we spoke face-to-face. It was a short moment, but we spoke.
The last time we even had mild contact was the 28th of January last year, so it's been over a year. I was slightly frustrated that he's too busy to talk like we used to, but that's not his fault. Well, it is his fault. He should pay more attention to his fans intead of working so much, but I guess I can put up with it until he goes on tour again and we can speak for those few moments... I said that I'd go to the tour in Worcester last year, but I guess I forgot.
Apart from this, reading the new book reminded me of how much I wanted to be an author. It's all there, I have more material than I need to try and get it published, but it's just that alot of things are getting in the way such as College and procrastination. Mainly procrastination. I'll get my Project Evaluation done tonight, but I know that I also have to do some other things for College that need doing. If I can't start writing it up during term-time, I'll just have to start in the Easter holidays. Reading Skulduggery Pleasant has got me so pumped to continue this long term project, and it's going to take a lot of patience to get it all written up because it's the self-proofed piece before I send it off... But I really want to get it done, it's an ambition.
Reminizing about this all also reminded me of the times when Emma and I used to fantasy RP all the time. Apart from doing it outside in the woods and in school, we used to do it in chatrooms aswell specifically for fantasy RP. I was never able to connect to the RP chat that Emma was in, so I ended up in a different chat room with a lot of other people that I grew to know and love. I don't talk to them as much now because after two years the chatroom died, and it's barely going now over a FaceBook page that I don't see much point in. Those days were fun and exciting, filled with arguments and fighting and love that wasn't personal until it got so intense that they took it personally.
I was always in the thick of it, always in the thick of all the action and the fights, causing drama and stirring until my adrenaline went through the roof. It sounds like something someone would pull a 'WTF' face to, but trust me it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. But now it's over, just like quite a lot of exciting things that happened in the past.
Speaking of exciting things that happened in the past, I started to watch an anime series that was recommended to me about a year ago from my good friend Zeze who I knew from the RP chatroom (We called it 'The Graveyard', just in case I start calling it that and you have no idea what I'm talking about), and she was my best friend. We did nearly everything together. Sort of like mine and Emma's friendship, it sort of fizzled out, except it just happened, I didn't force the fizzling out upon our friendship like I had to do with Emma.
So this anime is called 'Sekaiichi Hatsukoi 2'. I had watched the first series, and the series before that is called 'Junjou Romantica' which is a very popular Yaoi series. Zeze first started to 'make' me watch stuff like Shounen Ai (soft yaoi - just boys hugging and stuff), but I suppose I started to watch actual Yaoi series' because the concept of all that love made me so happy and warm inside. The way it all happened, the way the storyline rose and fell, just like real life, just like real relationships. The thoughts that went through the characters' minds are so realistic, and that's why I felt so attached to it for a while.
I didn't really want to mention this, but watching that made me think of another anime Zeze got me to watch, except it was about two girls and how their friendship was so strong that they were inseparable, that it almost seemed like more than a mere friendship. Like Emma and I. I didn't think about it until the end of the girl series, but I cried so much. Part of the reason why I cried so much was because of the outcome of the series, but I cried mostly because of Emma. It was only about a month after I decided that I should stop speaking to her, but then all the memories came flooding back and I cried all night. Nothing could stop me, not even myself. I look back on that night now, and it's as clear as day. The memory is so vivid that it's like it happened yesterday. The pain I felt, the agony of trying my hardest to get over it because I knew that crying wouldn't solve my problem... Maybe it did in the end. I knew that I was in so much pain that I cried, and crying made me feel worse physically too. It made me ill. I knew I had to stop crying, to distract myself. So I did, and that's how I started getting better. I didn't want to start talking about Emma again, but I couldn't help thinking about her again today. I sometimes think that I should talk to her just for closure, but I don't know how it would end up.
The main reason why I don't want to talk to Emma is because I don't need to though. I have Devin now, and I don't feel that closure is vital because he's there. He's there if I end up getting upset, but there's no need to cry over anyone else any more. It would be a waste of tears, unless those tears were for him.
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