I'm beginning to feel like it might just be the end of the world whenever you leave, and I was wondering: Is this a good thing, or a bad thing? I just feel like I'm getting deeper and deeper into this relationship every single day and there's nothing I can do about it. I want to be able to be as 'cool and casual' as I was before, and I guess that's why so many people thought I was a guy before, because I didn't care for soft and loving friendships. I solely wanted to have good time and piss around.
Now everything's different once more, although only for him. There hasn't been much change where friends and family are concerned except for the fact that I spend more time talking to him than anyone else.
It is normal to miss him this much even though he has only been gone for a few hours, even though I know he'll be back soon? Maybe I'm just worried. I don't want him to get hurt, and the only few ways I could possibly make sure that nothing bad is happening is to be talking to him at that moment, or to be with him. But I can't. And I wonder whether he thinks the same about me. When I'm gone, out, or at College, does he worry about me too?
I know I could have talked to him longer today if I had told Alex to wake him up, but I just wanted him to be as rested as he could be because I care about him that much.
Who knew that thinking of you more would make me feel better, eh?
Whether I feel worried or upset that I can't talk to you, the one thing I know for sure is that I really like you and I don't think anything could ever change that. Not another guy, not family/friend opinions, not even brainwash.
I hope that one day when I wake up, I'll wake up next to you.
These paragraphs have been a few hours apart... Throughout the night I've been thinking a lot, and I just want him to know everything that's on my mind... I want you to get back home and see this while I'm asleep at the desk, and hopefully it makes you smile just as much as being with you makes me smile everyday.
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